Categories
Uncategorized

The 2023 League Championship (and Anthem Bowl) Preview

At long last we have reached the end of the line. The gauntlet has thinned the herd to two, and before the year is out a new Champion will be crowned. More than that, an Anthem singer will be determined: either a new name will seize the mic or an old name will perform an encore. Who will triumph in the rivalry Championship matchup and claim his first title in over a decade (at least)? Who will sing our nation’s anthem next August/September (pending League negotiations with Frank’s travel agent)? Lets break it down.

The 2024 League Championship Game

It has been an incredibly long journey for BJC to get to this point. It has been well documented that his last and only championship occurred way back in 2004, but he also hasn’t even appeared in a League title game since that point, falling in the League Semis a total 5 times in the ensuing years. A triumphant win over the no-show Commish last week, exorcising the demons of his historic 2014 playoff loss, has brought him back to the precipice of ending The League’s second-longest championship drought (trailing only fellow original League member Maven who has never claimed a title).

The Central Division champ Brainbusters made it to this point behind The League’s second-highest scoring average, powered by QB1 overall Josh Allen. Allen will be sure to force feed his top two targets in Mike Evans and DJ Moore, both of whom have been outstanding this year, in particular Evans who’s monster game last week helped propel Brian past The Commish. The ground game is driven by a couple of big bruising backs in Derrick “The King” Henry and Gus Edwards, who have both feasted on the goal line this year.

On the other side of the Championship aisle is Brainbuster’s longtime rival Ryan Olsen and his Outatime squad. Though not quite wandering the desert for 20 years like BJC, Olsen is going through an 11 year title drought himself, last raising the trophy in 2012. Olsen last reached the big game in 2015, where he was bum rushed by Vaf and Jamal Charles’ infamous 5 TD performance. To get here, Olsen had to take down a pair of his West Division foes in Vaf and then 12-win Jacky G, bringing back memories of Olsen’s 2006 title where he bumped off the then-undefeated Commish in the Semis en route to his first of two League Championships. Outatime has now won 7 of their last 8, scoring over 113 in each of the last 6.

Olsen’s team is powered by his surprise elite RB pairing of waiver pickup Kyren Williams and mid round pick Rachad White. The WR trio of Chase-Olave-Ridley seemed more potent coming out of the draft than they have been this season, but they still provide plenty of firepower for a team that has put up points in bunches over the past month and a half. Isaiah Likely has been a revelation at TE and it appears Stafford will get the nod at QB as Outatime hopes his recent hot streak will continue in the big dance.

The oddsmakers have Olsen has a large favorite here, opening up as a 13+ point favorite. But as we all know, the game ain’t played on paper. Well, our game is technically I guess but fuck off you know what I mean. BJC has proven time and again this year that he has a team that can score and score big. There’s a couple of big injuries on both sides that the managers will need to navigate, as Brian will be without Josh Jacobs and potentially Cole Kmet, and Jamar Chase is banged up for Olsen. The Stafford/Fields decision Olsen makes could prove critical. The stakes are high, and the pressure around the managers is at a fever pitch. No matter how it shakes out, one drought will end. Who will drink from the Championship waters, and who will have to continue on, thirst unquenched for at least another year? Today, we will have our answer.

The Anthem Bowl

While the Championship game has the chance to define legacies, the Anthem Bowl will do so without a doubt. Meade has spent most of the season in the cellar, finishing with the 12 overall seed. He has The League’s second-worst career winning percentage, but has won multiple championships and has never sung an Anthem, insulating from true historical criticism. That could all end with a loss today, which would put the punctuation mark on a season to forget.

On the other side, of course, is Cody Daily and his So Much Honey squad. The hive has run dry over recent years, and while the honey used to overflow it now just seems to feebly pump out dust. Diesel has sung the Anthem in 2 of the last 3 seasons, including last year, and is himself trying to avoid history. With a loss he would become just the second back to back Anthem singer in history, earning him a t-shirt commemorating the feat, and would also become The League’s first 3-time Anthem singer. In fact, it would mark 3 of the last 4 Anthems, and give Cody the League’s first ever Anthem dynasty.

These two teams don’t deserve the long dissertation. They deserve only our derision. And we deserve the Anthem drama to go down to the bitter end. So here’s hoping for a close game that’s decided by JJ and Doubs on Sunday night. And when its done, we can hand one of these turds the mic and finally flush them down the toilet.

Categories
Uncategorized

2023 Playoff Preview

Press play

On a warm September night, each year, a dozen men gather round a table. While a feast has been prepared and drinks flow freely, that is not their purpose for being there. No, each year as the summer sun sets these men make the gather to select the football playing companions that will accompany them on a months long journey across the frigid and unforgiving landscape of the NFL season. And when that September night is through, each of the dozen League members dares to dream that come mid-December, the journey will continue.

For some, that dream quickly turns into a nightmare, the compatriots they drafted cut down on the field or failing to meet the moment. Try as they might, there is no escaping the hole for these gentlemen, and the dream ends with a whimper. Still others race out ahead of the pack, assured of their triumph, before they realize that the marathon is not a sprint, the breath stricken from their lungs, as they collapse in a heap and watch their opponents race by.

But for a select few, even as reality tries to shake them awake, even as the ghosts of seasons’ past attempt to infect their slumber, they continue to dare to dream. And while, inevitably, all but one will be awoken, on this day their dream lives on. On this day, Jacky G and BJC take their well-earned rest, and prepare for the weeks ahead where they will battle to earn their second League title. On this day, Olsen returns to the postseason after wandering the desert for 6 years, to go head to head for the 3rd time this year with perhaps The League’s greatest postseason performer of all time in Vaf. On this day, Jay Hey is just 3 wins away from claiming his first ever Championship, but faces off with a Commish who has been playing do or die games for a month and still ain’t dead.

On this day, 6 are gone, and 6 remain.

On this day, the 2023 League Playoffs begin.

The Commish enters into the 3/6 matchup as arguably the hottest team in The League, winning 4 straight to improbably climb out of a 3-7 hole to claim The East division title. Dear Leader averaged 127 points per game over that span, best in The League. It has been feast or famine all year for The Commish, topping the 120 point mark in all of his 7 wins while failing to score 100 in any of his 7 losses.

On the other side of this one, Jay Hey enters the postseason on a hot streak of his own, winning 4 of the last 5 to claim the final wild card spot (and almost the division and a bye) with a rout of Marky Mark in the final regular season game. That streak began back in Week 10 with a win over The Commish, and he’ll look to use another win over Dear Leader to propel him to the Championship. Not quite as feast or famine as Commish, The Jolly Roger has still been susceptible to rocky seas, topping 120 in 5 contests while failing to score 100 in another 5.

The projections had Commish as a slight favorite before Thursday night’s matchup saw Davante Adams go for 20 points, but this one is still anyone’s game. The Jolly Roger has multiple potential game wreckers throughout the lineup in Metcalf, Nacua, and Achane, not to mention the championship proven Mahomes-Kelce stack. If Jay can get anything out of waiver wire pickups Aaron Jones and Ty Chandler, he has the firepower to turn in a deep postseason run.

The Commish has plenty of firepower of his own to make this a potential shootout, with Lamar Jackson and Deebo Samuel coming off 30 point contests and rookie TE Sam LaPorta capable of a blow up performance at any time. What Dear Leader gets out of the ground game may make the difference in this one, with Tony Pollard being solid if unspectacular of late and Zack Moss not exactly lighting it up in replacement for the injured Jonathan Taylor.

The 4/5 matchup features a pair of division rivals who, even though the division race was put to sleep early, nonetheless have been penciled into the postseason picture for weeks. Winner of 5 of his last 6, Olsen finally jumped Vaf in the standings in the final week, claiming home field advantage in this highly anticipated wild card matchup. Outatime’s 9 regular season wins are the most Olsen has put up since his 2012 championship season, and put an end to The League’s longest running postseason drought.

Vaffy Kid was in a mini drought of his own, going first to worst in 2021 and then missing the postseason again in 2022. That American Nightmare is now over as Vaf returns to playoff dance floor where he is well known for cutting a rug. Interestingly, this is the first time Vaf enters the postseason as a wild card and his first playoff game in the opening round since his debut season in 2009; all Vaf’s 6 other appearances saw him win the division and earn a bye. He has never won in the wild card round, maybe good news for Olsen?

Projections have Vaf as a 10 point dog in this one and if he is gonna pull off the upset it figures to be on the backs of his receivers. ASB and Aiyuk are a potentially lethal combo through the air, but the ground game also has pop off potential with goal line hawk Monty and James Cook on the ascent. The key to Vaf’s late season surge was a waiver wire pickup of Dak Prescott, and he will of course factor into this one, but roster management in the wake of Keenan Allen’s injury may be a deciding factor as Rashid Shaheed draws the start at flex.

The strength of Olsen’s team, surprisingly given his draft strategy, may just be on the ground. Waiver wire pickup Kyren Williams has been a revelation and Rachaad White is finally turning into the back he was expected to be coming out of college. There’s plenty of talent at wide receiver even if the production has been spotty between Chase, Ridley, and Olave, mainly due to their QB situations. Still, all of them are their teams number one options and capable of a multi TD performance. The X factor for Olsen will likely be Justin Fields, who possesses tantalizing rushing upside but a scary passing floor against what many believe is the league’s best defense in Cleveland.

Anthem Bowl Preview:
7. Lemon Grove Avenue (7-7) vs. 10. Frank The Tank (5-9)
8. richter scale (7-7) vs. 9. so much honey (6-8)

Of course, the Anthem Bowl also kicks off this week. While Meade and Ant have “earned” byes into the next round, Nick and Mark are still struggling to make sense of how they narrowly missed the postseason and found themselves in this mess. Nick will face off against division foe Frank (whose reign of terror is finally ended) who he swept in the regular season series. Meanwhile, Marky Mark is all shook up but will have to find firm footing if he wants to avoid slipping to a So Much Honey squad who has found itself in a sticky situation after dropping the final 3 divisional games. We have 3 potential first time Anthem singers in the mix this year in Frank, Mark, and Meade, while Nick and Ant look to avoid the stigma of joining the multi-Anthem crew and Cody looks to avoid his 2nd straight Anthem and a t-shirt being made in his (dis)honor.

Good luck to all!

Categories
Uncategorized

Rivalry Week Preview / Mid-Season Review

2 Feets In (7-0) vs. Lemon Grove Avenue (4-3)

Lifetime Record: Nick 10 – Jack 8
Current Streak: Jack has won the last 4 

We start at the top, where Jacky G’s 2 Feet’s In firmly stands as he remains unscathed through the first half of the season. 3 games up on the nearest competition, Jack should 2 step his way into the postseason without much difficulty. No, the real question is just how long he can push this undefeated run, the second time in the last six years he has opened up the season with seven straight wins. Halfway to a perfect regular season, the squad is helmed by one of the most unique talents in NFL history in Tyreek Hill. But it’s not simply the Hill show, as week after week Jack has had multiple other players show up to the party, whether it’s Swift or Kittle or even the Dallas defense. There really isn’t a weakness on the roster, which is why Jacky G has put himself in position to grab a win each and every week.

Trying to sour the undefeated story on the other side of this matchup is Nicky Diamonds’ Lemon Grove Avenue. Though unlike Feets he has racked up some losses, Diamonds is also leading his division and seems primed for a second half run. The scary part for Nicks opponents is that he’s raced out to a 4-3 record without seemingly hitting his stride, as electric talents Hurts, Lamb, and Bijan still seem like they have another gear to hit. And if they do hit it, it might be cruise control down the Avenue on the way to the East title. We also of course can’t leave out Raheem Mostert, but the true key for LGA might be what he can get out of the WR2, TE, and flex spots. If he can find consistent performers for those spots, his star power in the other areas could finally put him over the top.

Meat Mavens (3-4) vs. Lobster Beesc (1-6)

Lifetime Record: Ant 15 – Meade 11
Current Streak: Meade won last 3

The flip side of the Nick/Jack matchup, the Meade vs Maven showdown features the two teams currently bringing up the rear. Maven is still firmly in the mix at 3-4, but it has been a struggle to get there. He opened the season at 2-1 with a couple of fortunate wins that saw him getting nearly nothing out of the QB and TE positions. Rather than stay the course or hit the waiver wire, Big Tony took a controversial swing, sending away his 2nd round pick AJ Brown and Brock Purdy for Justin Herbert and Evan Engram. The early returns have been, well, not great, as Brown has gone on a historic run since the trade and Herby has been up and down. The good news for the Maven is the return of first round pick Saquan Barkley and the continued emergence of Kenneth Walker. Ant has one of the premier RB rooms in The League, and he will look to lean on the ground game to get him back to the postseason.

Not as fortunate to scrape out a couple of early season wins, Meade finds himself at 1-6 and in dire straits, his playoff streak hanging in the balance. This one is quite frankly a must win for Meade, who would put himself in an almost impossible position with a loss. Meade of course invested heavily in the Jets (to the ire of the Jet fans), and found those investments crushed 4 snaps in when Rodgers went down. Still, even with that crushing blow Meades team has some pretty good pieces. Kamara, Breece, and Pacheco is a top tier RB trio and then of course there is Stef Diggs. Can Meade navigate his way out of the crater he’s dug himself into in the first half?

Dear Leader (3-4) vs. American Nightmare (3-4)

Lifetime Record: Commish 10 – Vaf 6
Current Streak: Commish won last year’s matchup after dropping the previous 2

It’s been a roller coaster of a season for The Commish, who has put up 125, 182 and 143 in his three wins and hasn’t topped 87 in any of his 4 losses. When it hits it hits but when it misses it really misses, and it’s been missing far too often this far. Injuries have crushed what looked like a promising WR trio, with Mike Williams out for the year, Deebo Samuel banged up constantly, and even Davante Adams missing large chunks of games. The biggest weapon so far for Dear Leader has been QB Lamar Jackson, an odd position for Commish to be in as he usually opts to wait on QBs in the draft.

Across the way is Vaffy Kid’s American Nightmare squad, which, although not the extremes of Dear Leader, has nevertheless been up and down as well. Vaf sports perhaps The League’s best WR trio in Aiyuk, St. Brown, and Keenan Allen, but it has been a struggle to cobble together the rest of the roster due in large part to injuries at the RB position. They haven’t been of the devastating season-ending variety, but the losses of David Montgomery and Khalil Herbert in the backfield have definitely hurt American Nightmare in recent weeks. Still, that three headed monster at WR is the stuff of dreams for Vaf and nightmares for his opponents, and should give him a chance in every game until he gets Monty back in the lineup.

Richter Scale (4-3) vs. Frank The Tank (3-4)

Lifetime Record: Mark 10 – Frank 10
Current Streak: Frank won last year by .44 points

A classic rivalry and the projected highest scoring matchup this week, Richter Scale takes on the defending champ Frank the Tank in a matchup that is sure to shake up the standings in one way or another. Marky Mark currently sits atop the Central at 4-3, which has him slotted as the 2 seed should the season end today. The star of the show is undoubtedly number 2 overall pick Christian McCaffrey, who is once again in a class of his own at the RB position and has scored a TD in every game for like 34 straight years or something like that. But the rest of the roster is no slouches either, with Adam Thielen turning back to the clock and Addison turning into the best JJ replacement you could possibly hope for. Also benefiting from JJ’s absence is TE TJ Hockenson (Mark has a strange number of Vikings or former Vikings on the squad). The team isn’t perfect, but if Devonta Smith and Stevenson ever get their acts together, watch out.

Early in the season it looked like the Tank had finally run out of gas, the two-time defending champ forced to start unrpoven names at WR in the absence of Cooper Kupp and Austin Ekeler. Right when the League was about to deliver the killing blow, a care package arrived on the battlefield in the form of AJ Brown. Then all of a sudden Kupp gets healthy, Ekeler returns to the lineup, and Frank The Tank appears fully operational heading into the stretch run. With Travis Etienne turning into a star, those 4 give Frank, on paper, probably the best collection of skill position talent in The League; if you did a draft starting the season from this point forward, all would probably be first round picks. Frank just needs to start translating that into wins, and he’ll try to get that ball rolling this week against long-time rival Marky Mark. Could an unprecedented three-peat be in the works?

Jolly Roger (4-3) vs. So Much Honey (3-4)

Lifetime Record: Jay 8 – Cody 6
Current Streak: Split last year’s matchups

This year’s Jay/Cody matchup features two teams seemingly headed in different directions. On the rise is The Jolly Roger, flag waving high with a winning record at the halfway mark. After an 0-2 start that saw him fail to reach 80 points in either game, Jay has topped 120 and gotten a W in 4 of the last 5, including wins in 3 straight heading into this week. The Mahomes/Kelce connection continues to roll for yet another year, but the real hidden treasure this season for Jay has been Puka Nacua and Christian Kirk. In a testament to management, Jay has managed to keep the RB position humming despite the absence of high picks at the position, with guys like Achane, Zach Moss, and D’Onta Foreman all taking turns pitching in monster performances. With a deep WR room and a decided advantage at QB and TE, Jay seems to be hitting smooth waters even with the turmoil in the ground game.

On the flip side is So Much Honey, who appears to be just barely keeping his head above the rising tide of Honey that is filling the room way earlier than expected. The main culprit, of course, is the extended absence of number one overall pick Justin Jefferson. But the rest of the roster hasn’t really panned out much better to this point. Mixon, Javonte, and the non-JJ receivers have all been disappointments, and QB Trevor Lawrence hasn’t lived up to his expected fantasy output. All of it adds up to the second lowest scoring team in The League. On the bright side, at 3-4 Cody sits just one game out of a playoff spot and it seems like JJ will return in a couple of weeks to give So Much Honey a chance to keep taking strokes even after most observers thought he would be finished.

Brainbusters (3-4) vs. Outatime (4-3)

Lifetime Record: Olsen 17 – BJC 10
Current Streak: BJC won last year and 3 of last 4

The BJC/Olsen showdown features two teams sitting at 5th and 6th in The League, narrowly holding on to the two final wild card spots. However, their situations seem entirely different. BJC is merely a game out of the division lead, and even though he’s had some tough luck push him to 3-4 he currently leads The League in points scored. Josh Allen is the engine, but similar to Jack’s team, it seems someone else steps up big for Brian each week, whether it is DJ Moore, Mike Evans, or Derrick Henry. That’s been needed due to the inconsistency of Aaron Jones and Josh Jacobs, who most analysts thought would form a lethal RB trio (and they still might). With a nice mix of players to slot in at flex as needed, BJC has the depth and the talent to make a push for the Central title.

Meanwhile Olsen, even though he has the better record, sits 3 games out of first place in his own division, with Jacky G seeming to run away with the West. That means he’ll likely have to go the wild card route, which is insanely crowded right now with 10 of The League’s 12 teams jumbled up at 4-3 or 3-4. After a 4-1 start, the injury bug has hit Olsen hard, knocking out QBs Justin Fields and waiver wire gem Kyren Williams. Still, the WR room is strong with Chase leading the way and Olive and Ridley struggling but a clear path to massive success. Darren Waller has started to come on as of late and Rachaad White gave him a great performance this past Thursday. If Outatime can hold the fort until reinforcements arrive, Olsen has a great shot to snap his missed playoff streak.

Categories
Uncategorized

2022 League Headlines, Power Ratings, and Notes – Week 4

Well boys, we are officially in the thick of it now. The Draft has come and gone, opening day is in the the rearview mirror, and the first big test for the 12 League members has been completed as we head into October with the first round of divisional play completed. With three games in the books the season is starting to take shape, teams are contemplating major shakeups, and storylines are starting to emerge. Lets take a look at the major stories in each division so far, before we break out the League Power Ratings.

THE EAST

We start of course with defending League Champion Frank The Tank, who is off to a blistering 3-0 start in his title defense. Led by the feared Mahomes/Kelce stack, Frank has swatted away all challenger in the early going, gaining an early 2 game cushion in the divisional race. Frank has now won 11 straight games dating back to last season, the longest winning streak of his career and tied for the second longest winning streak in the last 15 seasons.

Behind Frank are a trio of 1-2 teams all struggling to break out from the pack. Jacky G is the only team in the division to top 100 points in all three weeks, but has just one win to show for it. After an opening week win, the Maven hasn’t been able to top 91 points in either of the next two. BJC will carry a bit of momentum into week 4, after he finally got a W last week and snapped what was an 11 game losing streak dating back to last year.

THE CENTRAL

The only division without an undefeated team, The Central is certainly a bit murkier than The East. Tied at 2-1 each are Cody’s So Much Honey squad and Meade’s Lobster Beesc bitches. Meade made early waves in The League when he jumped out to a 2-0 start and accused other League members of being beholden to the Yahoo projections, while he himself has done nothing except start the highest possible projected lineup each and every week. Fortunately, he was smacked in the mouth this past week. Cody, meanwhile, has picked up where he left off last season, looking once again to insert himself into the playoff picture. After not making the postseason in his first three years in The League, Cody has reached the dance in 7 of the last 9 years.

Rounding out the bottom half are Jay and Commish, who made it there in very different ways. Jay is among the League leaders in points, but has been a bit snake bitten so far, dropping the last two. Commish lost the first two and finally came away with his first win of the year last week, but it wasn’t an especially impressive performance. Both teams made big trades with teams in the West this week, and hope to be Movin’ On Up in the standings quickly.

THE WEST

Pacing the Wild West are quite possibly the two best teams in the early going, Marky Mark’s Middle Of Spine Hurts and grand wizard of the Koo Kupp Klan Nicky Diamonds. Mark sits undefeated at 3-0, led by powerhouses Josh Allen and Nick Chubb. His team isn’t even firing on all cylinders yet. Meanwhile Diamonds has cruised out to a 2-1 start, the zero-RB strategy he employed in the draft working out to near perfection thus far as he sits second in The League in points scored.

Olsen’s Outatime might soon be outaplayers if the injury bug doesn’t relent soon. He’s missing three starters from the lineup this week in a crucial matchup with the Commish to try and get back to .500. On the plus side, the Tee Higgins acquisition looks like its already paying dividends. And rounding out the division is our most recent Anthem singer, Vaffy kid. After a narrow loss in week 1 that saw him score 130 points, it has been two straight weeks of poor showings. The Deandre Swift injury forced his hand into dealing for Jamaal Williams and Diontae Johnson this week in an effort to turn the tide on a ship that has lost 7 straight since last year.


And now to the Official League Power Ratings, 2022 edition. The League Power Rating, or LPR for short, is part of The League Historical Society’s efforts to compare teams not just today, but across the entirety of The League’s history. LPR measures average points per game (compared against the league average in points per game that season), ability to put up huge point totals while avoiding clunkers (high score + low score, again compared to the league average), and of course winning percentage. There are currently 194 individual seasons logged in The League’s database, and the average LPR is a nice even 100. Which is the point. So if your LPR is, say 110, that means you are 10% better than the average team not only this season, but in all season’s past. And if your LPR is 90, you’re 10% worse than the average team. The lowest LPR ever recorded is 69.6, and the highest is 141. The highest since 2007 however is 128.3. The ratings so far here in 2022

  1. MiddleOfSpineHurts – 125.5
  2. Frank The Tank – 124.1
  3. So Much Honey – 121.7
  4. Koo Kupp Klan – 119.4
  5. Lobster Beesc – 107.9
  6. Movie’ On Up – 99.9
  7. 2 Feets In – 95.9
  8. Outatime – 87.1
  9. Dear Leader – 84.6
  10. Meat Mavens – 81.9
  11. Brainbusters – 80.1
  12. Feed Me MOORE – 71.1

NOTE ON SURVIVOR

As you all know, there are currently three League members on death row for the crime of being terrible at fantasy football in the first three weeks: BJC, Ant, and Vaf. Their appeals have been rejected, and their executions will take place this coming Tuesday, at 9 AM, along with whoever else is terrible at fantasy football in Week 4. The manner of their deaths is TBD.

Categories
Uncategorized

The 2021 League Championship (and Anthem Bowl) Preview

After four months, it comes down to just one day. Ten of the dozen who embarked on the journey back in September have found their ships sunk to the unforgiving bottom of the League ocean. As the dawn breaks on this Sunday, January 2, 2022, only two still sail on towards the goal of immortality.

No Thursday nonsense. No Saturday bullshit. No, these two teams are going to duke it out on the high seas, one will win, one will lose, and it will all go down on a Sunday. The Lord’s Day. As the Fantasy Gods intended. Time to go to church.

1. FRANK THE TANK (10-5) vs 2. 2 FEETS IN (9-6)

It’s a classic 1 seed vs 2 seed matchup in the Championship, but these two teams journeys to the top seeds were anything but typical. Frank The Tank came into this year with his eye on avenging his Championship Game loss to Vaf from a year ago, but stumbled out of the gates; he began the season 3-5, 4 games back in the East and fighting for his playoff life. Since then he’s run off an astounding 7 straight wins, the longest win streak in his career, not only catching Cody en route to a stunning division title but claiming The League’s best record and earning his 5th career Championship Game Appearance. A career 1-3 in these games, losing the last 3, Frank has an opportunity to join the exclusive club of multiple time League Champs and etch his name into Ol’ Glory for the first time since 2007.

While not quite the same turnaround, not many expected Jack to have earned the Central Division and a bye back in the middle of the season. 2 Feets In was a middling 2-3 through 5 games and 3-4 through 7 games, struggling to stay above water in a division with a clear favorite in BJC who raced out to a 5-2 start. But then Brian’s collapse opened a crack in the door and Jacky G busted straight through it, winning 5 of the last 7 to close out the regular season and earn the division title and the coveted bye.

Both teams are coming off tremendous wins in the Semi Finals, where Frank’s team, overrun by covid, still managed to defeat Meade and Jack pulled off on epic comeback in a shootout against the Meat Maven who has still yet to win a playoff game that isn’t against Mark. Jack is the projections favorite in this one by 10+ points but both of these teams are capable of putting up fireworks, especially now that Frank’s stars return from the covid list.

As he has all year, Jack will rely heavily on his stable of wide receivers: Diggs, Allen, and Waddle are maybe The League’s most explosive trio of receivers. Dak seemed to get his groove back last week, Aaron Jones is always a threat to drop a 30 point game, and Sony Michel seems to have grabbed control of the Rams backfield. It’s not crazy to say that at a time when most teams are succumbing to the war of attrition, Jack’s roster might be at its strongest its been all season.

On the other side, Frank is also in pretty decent shape after weathering the storm last week. Kelce and Ekeler return to their featured roles, teaming up with a red hot Josh Allen to give Frank the type of firepower to match up with or overwhelm anybody at 3 different positions on the field. Mike Williams returns as well, and Frank’s stash of Ronald Jones paid off big time as Lenny Fournette went down to injury. The wild card here could be Odell Beckham Jr., who might get the start over a limited Mike Evans. Either way, that decision by Frank could turn out to be crucial.

There’s been projections, predictions, and prognostications all week but only one thing is for certain: at the end of the day, The League will have a newly crowned champion. Good luck fellas.

ANTHEM BOWL PREVIEW

11. Ressica Jobinson (4-10) vs 12. The Diamond Empire (3-11)

And now on to the real game. Just like the 1 and 2 seeds matching up in the Championship Game, the 11 and 12 seeds will match up in a scintillating Anthem Bowl matchup. Unlike the other game, this one was not much of a surprise as Diamonds and Vaf struggled to get anything going at all at any point this season. I could give you the rosters and break down the matchup and all that. But a) I’m running out of time and b) it wouldn’t exactly be a battle of the stars we’re talking about. I mean, these teams are here for a reason.

Vaf and Diamonds are both prior Anthem singers, and the loser of this matchup will join an exclusive list of multiple time singers. Vaf is looking to avoid the extra stain of becoming the first team to go from winning the title one year to singing The Anthem the next.

The Anthem Bowl has given The League some of its most exciting moments, and all we can hope for is that this game lives up to the hype. These two opponents have handled themselves with class all year en route to what seemed like an inevitable matchup and here’s hoping they are rewarded with one last bit of fantasy excitement before the year comes to a close.

Categories
Uncategorized

2021 Playoff Preview

As the temperature falls the tension rises. A dozen men embarked on a journey in early September, their spirits filled like sails from a warm summer breeze. Quickly their path was beset from all sides by obstacles large and small; broken bones, torn ligaments, disease, and bye weeks. As the seasons turned, the voyagers faced existential questions of the type fueled by crises, and the only answer left unconsidered and unacceptable was “turn back”.

No, for these men there was no turning back, no returning to the comforting shores of summer. You see, these men had made a commitment, to themselves, to each other, and to The League. For nearly two decades The League has trekked out on an annual pilgrimage, knowing full well the dangers lurking beneath the water, for the chance of attaining glory.

Ol’ Glory. That was the goal. Is the goal. Always and perpetually. Sure, the gold that comes along with it is a fitting reward. But gold is fleeting. Glory lasts forever. And only one man each year gets to etch his name into eternity.

The journey, like all journey’s past, became a war of attrition, claiming waiver wire pickups and first round picks alike without fear or favor. One by one they fell, their dreams dashed upon the rocks of poor draftings or swallowed by the ceaseless waves of injury. Far from etching their names into eternity, they were consigned to the ash heap of history. Nameless, faceless, another victim of the seas. Fish food (RIP Lenny).

After 14 arduous weeks, the voyage has claimed half the dozen. The other half remain, battered yet unbroken, weakened yet strengthened, weary yet energized. They can see the shore. They can see themselves pulling up to the dock of greatness. They can see themselves jumping off their ship of destiny and claiming the ‘ship of The League…

And then the dream fades into a haze. They look around at each other and realize that to make that dream a reality, they must turn these friends to foes and toss them callously into the sea like all the others, ignore the calls of their drowning fellows and sail ceaselessly and unswervingly towards glory. Because there can only be one. The journey continues, but the battle, why the battle, has just begun.

The 2021 League Playoffs has commenced. May the best man win.

3. The Meat Mavens (8-6) vs 6. Pastrami Papi (8-6)

The Meat Mavens exploded out of the gates this year, screaming out ahead of the pack to an incredible 6-0 start, the best in team history. Since then, however, the wheels have started to wobble and the check engine light has come on. After topping 120 points in 6 of his first 7 games, Tony has only topped 115 points twice since, failing to clear even 100 points in 4 of his last 6. All of this has added up to 2-6 finish. Still enough to win the West, but more than enough to hit the panic button.

On the opposite end of the spectrum is Pastrami Papi, who started the season 2-4 but, after swindling the Commish in a trade to acquire Alvin Kamara and Chris Godwin for a couple of lemons, won 6 of his last 8. He comes into the playoffs among the hottest teams in The League, after a resounding win over tormentor The Knights of Ryan in a win and in Week 14 matchup.

Ant jumped out to an early lead last night behind a 170 yard performance from team MVP Jonathan Taylor. Starting 3 RBs, Ant will look to continue his gains on the ground with Chuba Hubbard and Miles Sanders in the flex. Deebo Samuel is always a threat to score, but the main player to watch for the Mavens through the air is probably DK Metcalf. DK has been slumping, his downturn coincidentally or not occurring around the same time Ant started racking up losses. Metcalf hasn’t reached double digits in points since Halloween, and Ant will need him to regain his form if he is going to advance in the postseason for the second time in his career.

Mark’s squad is powered by his ground game as well, with Alvin Kamara, Joe Mixon, and ascending rookie Javonte Williams forming a 3 headed monster in recent weeks that propelled him into the postseason. Chris Godwin has taken advantage of the absence of Antonio Brown to return to a primary weapon down in Tampa, catching 10+ balls in each of the last two games. Pastrami Papi faces interesting decisions at WR2 and QB, where he currently has Michael Gallup and Jalen Hurts plugged in. The other options are Christian Kirk and Taysom Hill. Maybe the decision won’t be crucial, but these coin flips often turn out to be game-deciding in close playoff matchups.

Ant swept Mark in the season series, and this game is a rematch of his first career playoff victory from last year. Can Mark turn the tide in this matchup like he did on the season as a whole?

4. So Much Honey (9-5) vs 5. Lobster Beesc (9-5)

It’s a bit surprising to see Diesel have to play in the wild card round, considering his 5-0 start and finishing the season as the overall points leader, but a quick peek behind the curtains shows you why. So Much Honey has been ravaged by injuries, with season ending ailments to Run CMC and Chris Carson causing his ship to leak like he’s being worked on by an illegal masseuse. Still, Cody has navigated the deluge of honey like the experienced pro he is, swallowing the sticky situation whole and continuing to rack up numbers.

Meade’s season was tinged with controversy over his absurd roster moves regarding Mark Ingram, drawing accusations that he lacks integrity. While that is undoubtedly true, for some reason the fantasy gods saw fit to bestow upon him a playoff berth. Meade’s had some low points this year, but he managed to rack up wins, including wins in 6 of his last 8 to comfortably reach the postseason.

The early games in this matchup were not kind to Cody. Duds from Darrell Williams and Michael Pittman have put him behind the 8 ball, but a strong showing from Indy’s defense last night has kept him in play with his big guns still to go. Tom Brady, Cooper Kupp, and Justin Jefferson form an explosive aerial attack that can quickly put games out of reach for his opponents. Injuries have necessarily made this a top heavy team, as Cody looks to come out on top in a matchup of two guys who do most of their work from the bottom.

Meade got a huge performance last night from Hunter Henry to stake him to an early lead. Trotting out a 3 RB lineup typical of this year’s playoff teams, Josh Jacobs, Gaskin, and the returning Michael Carter form a hit or miss trio. The strength of Meade’s team is undoubtedly the Aaron Rodgers to Davante Adams connection, and Meade will be looking for those two to hook up early and often to keep Cody at bay.

These two teams split their season series, with Meade winning last week to dash Cody’s hopes at the division title and a bye. The real winner of the series will be determined in Round 3.

Categories
Uncategorized

Rest of Season Preview

After 11 weeks and a crowning of a new Survivor champion (congrats to Olsen), we have reached the precipice of the season thus far. The second set of division games that close out the season has historically been filled with drama and intrigue and this season looks to be no different. With 11 teams still in the mix and 7 teams within 1 game of a playoff spot, the last three weeks are shaping up to be season-defining. Lets dive in with a division by division breakdown of all the action ahead.

THE EAST

Current standings

Remaining Schedule:

Week 12: So Much Honey vs. Frank the Tank, Lobster Beesc vs. Ressica Jobinson

Week 13: So Much Honey vs. Ressica Jobinson, Lobster Beesc vs. Frank the Tank

Week 14: So Much Honey vs. Lobster Beesc, Ressica Jobinson vs. Frank the Tank

This season has not seen many teams pull away from the pack, but if there’s one team that fits the bill as a title contender it belongs to [redacted]. [Redacted]’s So Much Honey squad has pulled out to a League best 8-3 record and can punch a playoff, division, and bye ticket this week, potentially becoming the first team to do so. It’s even more impressive when you consider that [redacted] has been without number one overall pick CMC for a large part of the season.

But while it certainly seems like a near certainty that [redacted] will be headed to the playoffs just a year after singing the Anthem, the last three weeks may not just be a simple coronation. Meade has battled out all season to be within just a game of [redacted], but the tiebreaker scenarios mean that Meade will have to finish the season with the better record if he’s going to win the division. That means Meade will most likely have to win out, and hope Frank or Vaf can knock off So Much Honey in weeks 12 or 13 before Meade can stun him out of the East title and likely a bye in Week 14.

Things are even more difficult for Frank the Tank’s division chances. Frank sits two games back so he doesn’t control his own destiny and will need to not only beat [redacted] this week but get some help in Weeks 13 and 14. However, if he does manage to catch [redacted] in the overall standings, he’ll end up with the better division record and wind up holding the crown. A win this week is an absolute necessity though.

Realistically, the best chance for Meade, Frank, and Vaf (his only chance) to reach the playoffs is through the crowded wild card field. Currently Meade sits in the 4 seed and Frank in the 6 seed, but neither have commanding point total leads on any of the teams chasing them. Vaf is in dire straits, likely needing to win out to have any chance of the postseason.

While every game is important at this point, the huge potential swing game is Meade and Frank’s Week 13 matchup. A Frank win would hugely boost his playoff odds and pull Meade back to the wild card pack, while the opposite result could spell doom for the Tank and seal up a postseason berth for Meade.

THE CENTRAL

Current standings

Remaining Schedule:

Week 12: 2 Feets In vs Brainbusters, Trader Jay’s vs Diamond Empire

Week 13: 2 Feets In vs. Diamond Empire, Trader Jay’s vs Brainbusters

Week 14: 2 Feets In vs Trader Jay’s, Brainbusters vs Diamond Empire

No division has taken a bigger hit in the last few weeks than the Central, with every team entering the final division slate off a loss and 3 of the 4 teams licking their wounds off 3+ straight losses. While the past month has certainly not been kind, Jacky G’s 2 Feets In squad came out of the storm with a slim 1 game division lead. The division’s current point leader with a strong 2-1 division record, Jack is certainly in a position to capitalize and make the postseason the easy way.

Right on his heels though is the free falling Brainbusters squad, that early on looked like a legitimate title contender before Derrick Henry’s injury sent him spiraling on a 4 game losing streak, dropping him not only out of the division lead but currently out of a playoff spot entirely. Henry is not expected to return before the end of the regular season, so Brian will have to find some way to plug the holes in this sinking ship if he wants to take advantage of his thus far pristine 3-0 division record and fight back into the Central’s top spot.

Also only a game behind is Trader Jay’s, but the one game deficit hides the fact that the climb is quite a bit steeper than that. Jay’s 1-2 division record and points deficit to the other two contending teams likely requires him to win out in order to claim the top division spot. All 3 teams also have the wild card route, which promises to be filled with even more chaos.

Plus, while they may thing the eliminated Diamonds gas nothing left to play for except to play spoiler, there is still the chance Diamonds can climb out of the 12 or 11 spots into the Anthem Bowl and position himself much better while dragging the rest of the division down into the muck with him.

The biggest game to watch as of right now is this week’s Jack vs Brian matchup. Jack can gain an effective two game lead in the division race (literally over Brian, while the tiebreaker advantage over Jay will be big even if he pulls off a win). Meanwhile Brian can climb back into the top spot with a win while giving himself a 2 game lead in division record over everyone else in the division. That game will tell us a lot about how the rest of the season will shake out in The Central.

THE WEST

Current standings

Week 12: Meat Mavens vs Pastrami Papi, Knights of Ryan vs Bishop Sycamore

Week 13: Meat Mavens vs Knights of Ryan, Pastrami Papi vs Bishop Sycamore

Week 14: Meat Mavens vs Bishop Sycamore, Pastrami Papi vs Knights of Ryan

The West is yet another division that’s tough to navigate, but can gain some major clarity depending on this weekends outcomes. The Meat Mavens have struggled as of late, at least compared to their hot start, but enter the final 3 games with a 1 game lead over Pastrami Papi and a 2 game lead over the other two teams. The Maven can clinch the division with a win this week and a Commish loss, but if one of those two outcomes don’t happen things get a whole lot trickier.

Mark needs a win this weekend to stay alive in the divisional race, but a loss this weekend won’t kill his overall playoff chances. But with two teams in his division a game behind him, not to mention the other two 5-6 teams in the Central and fellow 6-5 teams Frank the Tank and 2 Feets In, a loss this weekend will make it much harder for him to stay above the playoff water.

Olsen and the Commish’s matchup is another huge one for both clubs, with their playoff fates likely hanging in the balance. Olsen’s point total gives him a better chance to withstand a loss but also eliminates any margin for error or control of his own destiny, while the Commish’s low point total means he would likely need to finish clearly ahead in the standings or else put up monster point totals the final two weeks. While Olsen’s division record means he has to win out and have Ant lose out to win the division, the Commish’s clearest path to the playoffs is through the division, by winning out and having Ant drop a game this weekend or next, setting up a winner take all matchup for the division title in Week 14.

But it all comes down to this weekend’s games. Let the chaos begin.

Oh, and fuck off Cody.

Categories
Uncategorized

2021 Week 4 League Power Ratings

LPR, or League Power Rating, has been updated this season to be easier to follow and give us a better view of how our current teams stack up against not only the rest of The League but other teams in The League’s storied history. LPR measures average points per game (compared against the league average in points per game that season), ability to put up huge point totals while avoiding clunkers (high score + low score, again compared to the league average), and of course winning percentage. There are currently 182 individual seasons logged in The League’s database, and the average LPR is a nice even 100. Which is the point. So if your LPR is, say 110, that means you are 10% better than the average team not only this season, but in all season’s past. And if your LPR is 90, you’re 10% worse than the average team. The lowest LPR ever recorded is 69.6, and the highest is 141. The highest since 2007 however is 128.3. And now, on to the ratings.

  1. So Much Honey – 132.8 LPR (4-0)

Not much of a surprise at the top of the list, as our most recent Anthem singer has exploded out of the gate so fast that it caught even the quickest masseuses by surprise. Undaunted by an early CMC injury, Cody has continued to stack together wins on the backs of a Cooper Kupp and Justin Jefferson led receiving core. Another challenge awaits though as a Chris Carson injury leaves him hurting once again and hoping he didn’t blow his load too early, which would certainly put him once again in a bit of a sticky situation that a wet hand towel certainly can’t handle.

2. Brainbusters – 125.5 LPR (3-1)

After a scorching hot start, BJC got brought down to earth a bit last week, as rival Olsen handed him his first loss of the season. Still, things look promising for Brian. He has yet to put up less than 117 points in a game this season, and Derrick Henry once again has League owners questioning how they ever passed on him in the draft. A huge matchup with our next team looms this week.

3. The Meat Mavens – 125.4 LPR (4-0)

The Maven has yet to lose, but he checks in a hair under BJC in the first rankings of the year. He’ll have a chance to flip that and possibly more this week, as he looks to hand the Bri Guy his second loss in as many weeks and jump out to his first career 5-0 start. It will be tough sledding however, as he was dealt a huge blow with the loss of Russell Wilson in Thursday night’s matchup. Thankfully for him DK Metcalf didn’t seem to give a damn who was playing QB, he just continued catching TDs.

4. 2 Feets In – 109.4 LPR (2-2)

Shockingly enough, that’s the end of the teams with winning records. Jack has been up and down this season, and is also affected by the Russ Bus injury that would certainly seem to limit Tyler Lockett’s potential. But with Diggs, Keenan, and Aaron Jones, Jack has plenty of firepower to dance a 2 step with any of The League’s teams. The winless Ressica Jobinson awaits.

5. Pastrami Papi – 102.5 LPR (2-2)

After an 0-2 start and 2 name changes, Marky Mark finally seems to have hit on the winning formula. Jewish meat sweats on rye has gotten Pastrami Papi out of the cellar and right back into the thick of things with 2 straight victories, the last one over arch rival Frank. NFC East counterparts Terry McLaurin and Zeke Elliot have led the way, and Mark will keep putting out a kosher spread so long as Zeke keeps eating like this.

6. Bishop Sycamore – 102.1 (2-2)

The Commish and Pastrami seem to be on different tracks, as Marky Mark’s rise has coincided with the Commish’s fall. Losing 2 straight and failing to reach the century mark in each, Bishop Sycamore has been left searching for answers to just what’s gone wrong. DeAndre Hopkins getting over his rib injury would be a good start, but the injury to David Montgomery certainly doesn’t help matters.

7. Frank The Tank – 97.6 LPR (2-2)

After winning 2 straight to get above .500, Frank’s team curiously no showed in a big rivalry matchup with Mark in Week 4. He’s hoping his matchup with Olsen this week will prove to be a get right game, with Josh Allen and Travis Kelce poised for a good old fashioned Kansas City shootout. Maybe Mike Evans and new addition Dalton Schultz can ship in as well in the rare but always fun double TE roster setup.

8. Lobster Beesc – 97.0 LPR (2-2)

Meade has definitely flown under the radar this year but he still sits at .500 and right in the thick of things. Aaron Rodgers and Davante Adams pose a blow up threat every week, and Darren Waller is as steady as it gets at TE, but he needs more consistency from the rest of the roster if he’s going to compete for more than table scraps this season.

9. The Knights of Ryan 89.1 LPR (1-3)

Olsen managed to grab a must win victory over one of The League’s early season favorites last week, avoiding the dreaded 0-4 start and gaining some momentum heading into another tough matchup with Frank the Tank. Justin Herbert is proving last year was no fluke, and Tyreek Hill got back to his explosive ways just in time to save Olsen’s season.

10. The Diamond Empire – 75.7 LPR (1-3)

Speaking of getting up off the mat, The Diamond Empire also grabbed their first win of the year last week behind a comeback game from Saquon Barkley. He’ll be missing Calvin Ridley this week, but that could just mean more work for fellow Falcons Mike Davis and Kyle Pitts as Atlanta heads over to foggy old London Town for a matchup with the Jets. Can Nick expand the Empire to Britain and enjoy some tea and crumpets at Cody’s expense (hold the honey please)?

11. Ressica Jobinson – 73.7 LPR (0-4)

Surprisingly enough, Ribby Raf does not sit in the cellar in the first Power Ratings, winless though he may be. That’s probably not much consolation though, as the defensing champ has looked rather defenseless in the early going and his season (and the Trophy) are in danger of slipping away from him.He got a much needed big game out of Robert Woods on Thursday, but he’ll need the rest of the gang including Lamar and Nick Chubb to show up if he’s going to take down Jack to grab his first win of the season.

12. Trader Jay’s – 70.6 LPR (1-3)

It would have been a bit of a shock in League circles if you had said Jay would be sitting at last in the Power Ratings after his stellar opening week showing, but here we are. Jay has dropped 3 straight and looked fairly uncompetitive doing so, failing to top 82 points in any of the outings. He’ll square off with a similarly reeling Bishop Sycamore squad this week, and AJ Brown has been given the green light, so maybe this is just the matchup Trader Jay and Dalvin Cook need to right the ship. Either way, Jay is 2 for 2 on team names this year and that has to count for something.

Categories
Uncategorized

Just The Facts – Week 3

Some Sunday morning facts and figures for each matchup as we head into Sunday play of the final game of the first slate of division matchups.

The Meat Mavens (2-0) vs Bishop Sycamore (2-0)

While the Maven holds a lifetime losing record against The Commish at 11-15, he has inched considerably closer to .500 over the last few years, claiming 6 of the last 7 head to head matchups. And he has to feel good about his chances of winning this one after his fourth 2-0 start of his career (2006, 2013, 2019). After making history with his first career playoff victory last year, Ant looks to set another personal milestone this week with a win that would give him his first career 3-0 start. A hot start from DJ Moore on Thursday night has these projections neck and neck.

The Commish also comes in boasting a 2-0 record, his first such start since the 2018 season that he’d rather forget (5-0 / 7-2 start that saw him lose his last 4 and miss the postseason). He also has a bit of history on the line here, as he looks to become the first owner to reach the career 150 win mark. Some injury questions linger this week with star wideout DeAndre Hopkins edging towards a gamete decision and Odell Beckham Jr slated to play his first game in nearly a year after a torn ACL. We may see some lineup shuffling from the Commish before kickoff in this pivotal battle for the top of the West.

Jaystar Royco (1-1) vs 2 Feets In (1-1)

These teams had polar opposite week 2 games, starting with Jay who came in off of a stellar opening game performance and laid a huge dud in his week 2 loss to BJC. Jay’s 56 point performance in the loss was his 3rd worst career outing, and his 90 point margin of defeat was the worst of his 13 year career. He gets another shot at career win number 75 this week in a matchup with Jacky G, with the lifetime series between the two teams split at 6 wins a side. Although Jack has won 3 of the last 4, Jay did get the W in last year’s matchup.

Speaking of career win 75, Jack put that notch in his belt last week with a League leading 157 point performance. At 75-77-1 for his career, a win this week would push him to the precipice of a career .500 record, which only 4 League members currently possess. Jack’s performance last week was only 2 points off his career best point total of 159, which he set in week 4 of last season. The projections have Jack as a pretty big favorite this week, as Jay deals with injuries to Dalvin Cook and Jerry Jeudy and AB missing the week with covid.

The Diamond Empire (0-2) vs Brainbusters (2-0)

They say to throw out the stats when divisional foes square off, and the Diamond Empire is perfectly fine with that after its performance the first two weeks. Nick has only started 0-2 in his career one other time, and it was 10 years ago in a season that saw him finish a career worst 2-11. He has failed to reach 91 points in either of the first two games, which he has lost by a combined 120 points. He will once again seek his 75th career victory, but his opponent is maybe The League’s most feared team through the first two weeks. Perhaps the good news is that he’s won 3 of the last 4 matchups against him.

BJC comes in with his first 2-0 start since 2017 and the fourth of his career, but the point totals he’s putting up in this start are much more impressive than any other he’s previously put together. Averaging an astounding 150.5 points per game, its the best two game points stretch of Brian’s 19 year career. He’ll go for his 3rd career 3-0 start this week in matchup featuring the League’s current 1 seed vs the current 12 seed. Brian has a 7-6 career lifetime record, and he’ll look to take another strike at the hear of The Diamond Empire.

Frank The Tank (1-1) vs Ressica Jobinson (0-2)

Frank has very impressive rebound performance in Week 2 to get himself back to .500 and avoid a dreaded 0-2 start. He improved to 15 games over .500 for his career in the process and heads into a rematch of last year’s championship game on a win streak. It also gave him a career 10-9 record vs Meade, a mark he can’t quite claim against defending champ Vaf. The win was made more impressive due to the fact that Jarvis Landry left the game after just 1.4 points. He’ll have a slight projected edge in this one even without Landry, as JuJu slides into the starting lineup for the Tank.

Vaf’s title defense is off to a sputtering start, as he fell to 0-2 for just the second time in his career. The last time he was 0-2 he finished the season a career worst 4-9 in the midst of a 4 year playoff drought. Obviously Vaf is hoping to avoid a similar fate and get back on the right track this week. And at least historically, Frank has been a pretty good matchup for Vaf, as he boasts a career 9-5 record vs the Tank, winning each of the last 3 including, obviously, last year’s championship victory.

Lobster Beesc (1-1) vs So Much Honey (2-0)

Meade has been perfectly mediocre to start the year, averaging just over 100 points and sporting a 1-1 record. In fact he’s been so mediocre I can’t come up with any interesting stats about his season. He caught a break week 1 and didn’t catch a break week 2. However, he did catch another massive break this week with a mid game injury to number one overall pick CMC. Meade’s been dealing a bit in the taboo art of hoping for injuries to other’s teams this year and frankly its disgusting. Its even more disgusting that its working.

On the other end of this matchup is So Much Honey, off to an overwhelming start that’s made masseuse’s statewide rush to get extra towels. Fresh off an outstanding if controversial rendition of the National Anthem, no doubt aided by soothing his vocal chords with copious amounts of warm honey, Cody is 2-0 for the first time since 2017 and looking for the first 3-0 start of his career. His 137 and 153 point outbursts are his best back to back performances since way back in 2013, coincidentally also in weeks 1 and 2. Cody earned his first playoff berth that year, ultimately falling in The League Semis. He’ll look to repeat that trend this year, but it will take some great management these next few weeks with McCaffrey on the sidelines with a hammy injury.

Pastrami Papi (0-2) vs The Knights of Ryan (0-2)

Our only matchup of winless teams features a couple of teams who last went 0-2 in 2018 and never recovered. The good news for one of them is, they both started that year 0-5, which will be impossible this year. The bad news is one of them will have to fall to 0-3. Mark’s team has been slightly better than the record would indicate, averaging about 110 points per game but failing to reach the 120 point mark that has been a sort of win barometer over the last half decade or so. That’s a problem when both of your opponents put up 130+ obviously. His last 0-3 start ended with him going 3-10 on the season. Obviously he’s hoping for a much better outcome to this year.

For Olsen the struggles continue. He’s failed to post a winning record the last 4 years and dropping the first 2 this year brings his current losing streak to 5 games. The loss to The Commish week 1 is understandable with his opponent putting up 148 point points, but his week 2 loss was a big ball of frustration, as he lost 88-82 to Ant behind a no show Sunday night performance from Tyreek Hill. You simply can’t drop games when your opponent fails to score 90 points, and Olsen has only dropped one such game dating back to 2015. While Mark’s had his struggles, historically speaking Daddy Yankee has been a rough draw from Ry O: Mark is 11-6 in the all time series, though over the last 6 these teams are 3-3 against each other. Another fun fact: this is the 3rd year in a row they’ve been in the same division, and in each of the 3 previous years they were in the same division, they split their head to head matchups. Who will draw first blood this year?

Categories
Uncategorized

The League 2020 Semi-Finals Preview

The League Wild Card continued to provide the excitement and drama we’ve seen throughout the regular season, kicking the 18th postseason off with a bang. And no bang was more startling or has shaken up The League as much as Anthony Barlotta, Big Tony, THE Meat Maven, finally winning his first career playoff game, stunning Marky Mark in an act of dad on dad violence to earn a date with Vaf in The League Semis.

In the 4 vs 5 matchup, we saw a good old-fashioned shootout with the defending champ managing to climb out to a sizeable lead and hold on despite Brian’s best efforts on Monday night to pull off the miracle comeback. Meade’s title defense continues on with a matchup against division rival Frank the Tank this week. Meanwhile, BJC heads home looking for answers of how he let the East slip away, which drew him into his matchup with Meade in the first place.

Lets take a quick look at how the teams who reached the Final 4 stack up:

Ant is looking to turn his first playoff win into a Cinderella run, but Vaf is the one holding the glass slipper here. On paper, there’s little doubt in this one. Vaf holds the lead in virtually all categories, whether we look at this simply from this season, career, or head to head. When Vaf gets into the playoffs, he’s reached the Championship Game an astounding 5 out of 6 times. And again, at least on paper, he’s the overwhelming favorite to make it 6 of 7.

Alvin Kamara, James Robinson, and Calvin Ridley provide Vaf with a headline group of 3 starters who typically provide Vaf with a lethal mix of safe floors and week winning potential. Then there’s guys like Robert Woods (in a plus matchup against the Jets secondary) and Lamar Jackson (in a plus matchup against the Jags) and its tough to find a weakness in Vaf’s armor for Ant to exploit.

It certainly doesn’t help matters that the two players Ant had play in the early games didn’t exactly explode, with pedestrian outings from Austin Ekeler and Robert Tonyan. Emmanuel Sanders, Wayne Gallman, and Raheem Mostert isn’t a trio that strikes fear into the heart of opponents. JuJu Smith Shuster, last week’s hero for Ant, will likely need to have another big game if Ant is to pull off the upset, and he’ll most likely need to have a big game from Russ Bus as well. Key contributions the defense and kicker positions wouldn’t hurt either.

In our other matchup, we have Frank and Meade squaring off for the third time this season. While Meade won the previous two matchups, it would be hard to take anything away from that fact. These two teams are about as close as close can be in almost every category, the complete opposite of the 1 vs 6 matchup.

Meade has gotten out to a solid start, with the trio of Aaron Rodgers, Stefon Diggs and Buffalo’s defense outdoing their cumulative projection in yesterday’s games (though Rodgers fell a bit short of his own personal projections and Meade was probably hoping for a bit more production there). Meade still has a bunch of bullets left in the chamber, like ascending rookies Brandon Aiyuk and Cam Akers, steady if unspectacular Amari Cooper, and, oh yeah, some guy by the name of Dalvin Cook.

Frank, meanwhile, has his whole stable of horse ready to run. Physical freaks DK Metcalf and Derrick Henry are always a threat to break the game wide open, David Montgomery and Marquise Brown are heating up at the right time, and Travis Kelce is the at TE is probably the biggest mismatch in fantasy football. If there is a place for Meade to make up some ground it will be with another pedestrian performance out of James Conner in Frank’s flex.


That’s it for this week’s preview. Since some people were asking, in the Anthem Bracket the Commish is squaring off with Jacky G and Jay Hey faces the Diesel. Good luck to everyone as the postseason continues.