After 13 weeks that were, shall we say, unique in The League’s history, the regular season has finally come to a close. Half of The League’s hopes of reaching the promised land have officially been dashed, while the luckier half (emphasis on the lucky where Frank is concerned) (just kidding Frank) (but not really) will move on with hopes of attaining greater glory. For those teams, the book is not yet closed on their power ratings, and their place in The League’s history is not yet set in stone. For the others, although they must now battle it out to avoid last place, the ink is dry on their official stats. We’ll take a look at where things stand, and provide a bit of a post-mortem on the teams who failed to reach the postseason to hopefully put the numbers in a bit more context. Note before we begin: between the current League owners there have been a total of 170 individual seasons, and LPRs have ranged from a high of 173.9 to a low of 88.0. The average is 126.4. On to the ratings:
1. The Undisputed Era (11-2) – 154.7 LPR [up .8 from Week 12]
Unsurprisingly, Vaffy Kid maintains the top spot in the ratings after notching his 11th win, which knocked Jacky G out of the playoffs and catapulted Big Tony in. This has been arguably Vaf’s best regular season of his already storied career. Vaf has only topped 150 in LPR one other time, in his 2011 championship season that saw him become the only team in League history to win back to back titles. If he maintains his current LPR, it would place him as the 6th best team in League history and the third best since 2007. His 11 regular season wins is also a career high. Quite a return to form for Vaf, who had previously missed the postseason the past 4 years, which was the longest active streak in The League.
2. Frank The Tank (9-4) – 149.0 LPR (up .2)
Frank climbs back into the number two spot with his week 13 win, which also delivered him the Central Division crown and a coveted bye with some help delivered by The Commish. This is Frank’s second career division title, and first bye since his rookie championship season all the way back in 2007. And according to LPR, it is his best season since then as well by a huge margin, as he topped the 140 mark only one other time (this season is currently 13th all time in LPR). It’s been a big year for Frank, as he also reached triple digits in career wins. Now he’ll look to add another trophy to the case.
3. Lobster Beesc (9-4) – 147.3 LPR (down 2.3)
Meade thought he had the division all but locked up with a one game lead and a matchup with The League’s basement dweller Commish. Unfortunately for him, The Commish wasn’t interested in laying down to coronate the defending champ, and put a whooping on him to force him to settle for a wild card berth. Meade now has a date with BJC in round 1, and he’ll have to take the long road if he wants to defend his title and become just the second League member to win back to back ships. In terms of LPR, this is actually currently Meade’s best season ever, ranking 15th all time, slightly better than his career high from last year of 146.5. If he’s to win the title this year, he’ll likely have to improve on that number even farther.
4. CARONIE (8-5) – 139.4 LPR (up 10.7)
Mark saved his best regular season performance for last, putting up a massive 150+ point performance to stun Brian and win the East. It was Mark’s highest scoring output of the year, and pushed his LPR up over 10 points, easily the biggest jump of the week. Mark ended the season on a 5 game win streak and he’ll look to keep it rolling against Big Tony and force a rematch of his rivalry week showdown with Frank. Mark’s season would currently rank 4th on his personal all time list, and 32nd overall.
5. Brainbusters (8-5) – 134.6 LPR (down 1.3)
Until Week 13 Brain had been leading a charmed season, winning 6 straight games heading into a division deciding matchup with Marky Mark. That win streak was snapped in abrupt fashion, dropping Brian from the 3 seed to the 5 seed and into a first round playoff bout with the defending champ. His current LPR is his 4th highest, and sits 47th all time.
6. 2 Feet’s In (5-8) – 127.3 LPR (down .6)
If playoff berths were awarded by LPR, Jack would have just snuck his two feets in. Unfortunately for him, the most important number is wins, and 5 just doesn’t cut it. Jack faced just a brutal schedule this year, having nearly 100 more points against than the next closest team, and facing a slate of teams that put up more points against him than even Vaf put up this year. You can’t chalk it all up to points against though – Jack was middle of the pack in points for, middle of the pack in LPR, and ultimately just a little shy of middle of the pack in wins. And when the chips were down, he had his chance to get that 6th W in the season finale, but couldn’t close the deal. Jack has now missed the playoffs for a second straight year. This was his 5th best season (out of 11 total) and 80th all time.
7. Down With The Brown (5-8) – 125.6 LPR (down 2.4)
It’s tough to place the blame for an entire season on one trade, and probably not even fair to do so, but Nick’s downfall began when he made what was supposed to be a blockbuster trade for Michael Thomas. The big chips included in the deal, at least at the time, all went on to have disappointing seasons. Where Nick lost the deal was with the the throw in of waiver wire pickup rookie WR Justin Jefferson. Jefferson immediately exploded, propelling Mark to an improbable division title, while Nick’s team steadily fell off the map from title contender to missing the dance altogether. From week 4, Nick went from a 3-1 record and 149 LPR to ultimately a 5-8 record with an LPR nearly 25 points lower. He finished 5th in total points behind 4 130+ point performances, but in his last 8 games went 0-6 when he failed to reach that mark, never topping 112 points in any of those crushing losses. Like Jack, this season ranks 5th of 11 for Nick in LPR, and 88th overall. Just below average for what looked like such a promising season.
8. The Knights of Ryan (6-7) – 124.98 LPR (down 3.5)
We can’t talk end of season collapses without discussing Olsen’s. After a 6-4 start, Ry O looked to be in the driver’s seat to ending his playoff drought and earning a wild card. 3 straight losses later and Knights fans are asking themselves what the hell just went wrong. In firm control of his own destiny even up until Week 13, Olsen let it all slip away with back to back 62 point outings in the last two critical games. Warning signs first popped up back in Week 8, where he lost an absolute soul crusher in a rivalry week water pistol fight with BJC (77-64). This season ranks 6th of 16 in LPR for Olsen, but you could throw the number out for this one – this was one of his worst seasons ever given the way it ended.
9. Meat Mavens (6-7) – 121.2 LPR (up 1.1)
Hey, its the Maven! The number 6 seed and final wild card team slots in all the way down at number 9 in the LPR, but he doesn’t care about all that because in the end he’s dancing. Ant’s current LPR is 109th all time, and if he finishes at that mark he would be the 10th worst team to make the postseason. The beauty of the postseason though is that there’s still games to be played baby. If Ant intends to get where he’s been searching his whole League career, that number will rise. He’ll have to put up better numbers than he has though if he’s going to run the gauntlet through a playoff field of at least 3 teams who have eyes on the upper echelon of League history.
10. Del Boca Vista (4-9) – 118.0 LPR [down 2.5]
It was a season to forget for Jay Hey, as he was denied his serenity now and will have to once again partake in the ugly underbelly of The League’s Anthem Bracket. Jay peaked in Week 5, after a decisive victory over Diamonds pushed him to 3-2 and a 144 LPR. He’s won one game since, promptly dropping 3 in a row and then 4 in a row to end the regular season. Del Boca Vista found a lively community in the trade market and waiver markets this year, making a bevy of moves that have drawn questions from pundits, namely: what would have happened if he just stuck with the team he drafted? Hindsight is 20/20, and unfortunately we can never know the answers to the question. What we do know is that Jay’s chances of hoisting the trophy have been foiled yet again. This was his 4th worst season in LPR, and the only 3 times he finished worse he finished in 12th place.
11. La-Hoo-Za-Her (3-10) – 113.7 LPR (up 4.8)
Hey, the Commish isn’t in last place in something! He’ll take it after what has been a miserable year almost from the jump. Give credit, or don’t, for battling to the finish and making at least some sort of impact on the playoff mix, but that’s about all that’s gone right this season. The Commish at least avoided having a historically bad season, and put up respectable point totals, finishing 7th in points. All that was good enough to just come up painfully short week after week. La-Hoo-Za-Her nearly perfected mediocrity, crushing along while putting up over 100 points in 12 of 13 weeks but never topping 130 until Week 13. Hey, maybe he’s peaking at the right time to avoid the Anthem? This is The Commish’s second worst season of all team in LPR, and the lowest single season win total of his career. He finishes up at 137th in the all time rankings.
12. So Much Honey (4-9) – 112.0 LPR (up 2.6)
Bringing up the rear is our champ from only 2 seasons ago. Cody had a League-best 4 year run of playoff appearances, and had reached the dance in 6 of the last 7 years, culminating in his 2018 title. That streak has now been snapped. On the bright side, Cody’s 6 game winless drought built up enough pressure to finally release in an overflow of honey which consumed rival Jay Hey in their Week 13 showdown, in the process avoiding a tie with the Commish for the League’s worst record which would have dropped him to the 12 seed in the Anthem bracket as well. Unfortunately, all that got him was a wet towel cleanup and the 11th seed. Cody enters the Anthem Bracket with his 3rd worst season of all time (147th overall), and his worst since his 2-11 finish way back in 2012. He came in last that year, one year before the Anthem punishment first came into existence. He’ll be hoping for a happier ending this time.